May 16, 2014

Bad Pentecost Clip Art

As I was scouring the internet for a Pentecost icon for our parish newsletter, I discovered that this feast day offers the mother lode of horrendous images. Forget the 'eye of the beholder' -- there's some ugly stuff out there. When you combine tongues of fire, wind, a variety of languages, and a dove, I guess this isn't altogether surprising. But yowza!

I'm especially looking forward to this 50th day after Easter celebration since our beloved retiring bishop, Tom Shaw, will be making his last visitation to St. John's as diocesan bishop. In twelve years as a rector, I've never actually had a bishop show up on a major feast day. The Sunday after Easter, yes. Random Sunday in July, of course. So I'm thinking this will be a great day and not just because I get out of writing a sermon.

In any case, my Pentecost gift (June 8th this year) to you includes a few of my "favorites" from the online horror I encountered. (by the way, if you're looking to start a blog, I'd suggest Bad Church Clip Art -- it would go viral!)
This looks like the oil refineries in Elizabeth, New Jersey
that are visible off exit 13A of the Turnpike.

Can you say "Ad for Lasix surgery?"

"Again?" What, does Pentecost bore you?

Pentecost: As imagined by Jerry Garcia.

Angry Birds! 

There's a fine line between a flame and a dunce cap.

Pentecost is so amazing that the guy on the right did a face palm.

When it rains, God is crying. Or what are the Magi doing here?

On Pentecost, everyone gets electrocuted.
Ok, who's hungry? How about some grilled pigeon?
May Day! May Day! We're being dive bombed by a flaming bird!
This appears to be a scarecrow meant to keep that
pesky Holy Spirit from eating the corn stalks.

No.

17 comments:

Bob Chapman said...

The second one reminds me more of the eye of Sauron.

Gale Grey said...

no Nautilus images with fire and a bird?

Timothy Schenck said...

Here, Gale. Check out this travesty! http://www.partnersgallery.com/fenley-k-flamingnaut.html

Solange De Santis said...

And I thought it couldn't get any worse than Bad Nativities.

Relling Westfall said...

Hilarious!

Meredith Gould said...

The 6th one looks like a gathering of St. Jude dudes.

caralulu said...

I have never been tempted to use LOL, but I laughed so loud I woke the dog. Strangely she didn't think they were as funny as I did.

Sister Mary Winifred said...

One more reason for sticking with the BCP -- no creepy, bad art!

Gale Grey said...

Fr Tim - I think that is amazing! you may want to consider updating your twitter profile photo to that one - the phrase 'fear of God' comes to mind

Traylor said...

To be fair, Pentecost is difficult to conceptualize visually.

Eric Funston said...

Well done, Tim ... made me laugh out loud late on a Saturday night after finishing a sermon I'm sure is abysmally bad. Just what I needed!

Reformed Catholic said...

I just want to say, as a born and raised Elizabeth NJ boy, the refineries are located in BAYWAY, not Elizabeth NJ.

hatgrlstargazer said...

Apparently, the Disciples were Sims?

Timothy Schenck said...

Reformed Catholic, I expect I'll be getting a phone call from the Bishop of New Jersey and the mayor of Elizabeth about slander. I used to go back and forth between Baltimore and New York a lot and there is nothing quite like that oil refinery smell. There's not enough incense in the world to cover that up...

Jay Croft said...

Bayway? Never heard of it.

I, too, have driven that route many times, although not in recent years. (Deo gratias!)

Stushie said...

You did ask me permission to use the scarecrow Pentecost dove image, right? A lot of art makes no sense to anyone but the artist, but feel free to mock the creativity of others, however limited their interpretations may be in your log infested eyes.

Adam McQuaid said...

Great, you are professional? Looking great. I'm too lazy to create some clip art so I'm always download free vector clip art from Cannypic, when I need some for my own blog. Try to and maybe you'll get some new ideas about your new clip art. Good luck.